What You Don't Say To Your Ma
She tells you she wants
some lye soap, cayennes, and corn,
only if you're going anyway,
to which you respond
Of course, I had planned on it,
knowing that telling her you
were going to the market
tomorrow was not anything
other than a ploy
to keep talking and so then she tells
you how the groundhog ate all the blooms
off the pansies you got for her at Lowe's,
twenty bucks that could have bought
some food, but she was wanting
to see those pansies this winter,
when the cannas had given
up the ghost and the pampas
was leaning heavily toward
the house, how happy that would
have made her on those grey days,
how she couldn't bring herself to call
anyone to kill it as it trusted
her so, like a pet, so she might just put moth
balls around what's left of the pansies
and maybe they'd bloom again and maybe
they'd just stay green for a little while
standing out there proud-like amidst
all the grey and brown and you want
to scream I'm dyin here, Ma,
and I'm not sure if getting better
is better than staying worse, but all you say
is I'll go get you some more pansies.
8 comments:
always a favorite, but i find myself visiting it more and more of late.
You know, jim, after I wrote this and read it, I thought about you.
You always have given me the encouragement to keep writing.
I thought about how sometimes it's just too hard to write from where I am, but I write just the same.
And sometimes I know I just keep going over the same old territory, but I keep on.
I wish I could open myself like my knockout rose, over and over again, despite the bugs, the heat, the drought.
I wish I could keep giving like that.
And accept when it's time to stop giving for a little while and just rest.
It's always so good to see you here...
So true Maggie, many things you just keep to yourself not want to hurt feelings. I love pansies but they never grow well for me. They always die for me, I can't even blame the animals for eating them. Maybe I water too much! I like the humor too! :)
Hi Jo,
The groundhog is ever present in mother's life these days, and I think they were getting along ok until he ate the heads off the pansies.
I don't have any trouble with pansies. Of course, it helps if you plant them shortly after you get them (which I have not done--had them over a week), but I think they'll make it.
I love to look out my kitchen window in winter, before a really hard freeze, and see their beautiful yellow and purple heads.
I also plant ornamental kale and cauliflower. They not only make it through the winter, they surive all summer long. The ones I put out last fall have just now succumbed to some hungry wabbits!
Hey Maggie,
You must plant the pansies inside? I do plant them right after I get them in the Spring, but rarely do they last through summer. I don't have a bay window to put them in!
Many a groundhog are shot around here, didging holes in farmers fields, and eating gardens!
No, I plant them outside. It can get as cold as 15 to 20 below here, but that's not the norm.
It is very James-ish, yes.
But very you, too.
I think you both have wonderfully natural, unforced voices. Organic is the term that comes to mind. I think both you and James let the poem say what it has to say however the hell it wants to say it. Which is a gift.
Enjoyed this poem, Maggie.
Reminded me of the groundhog/woodchuck whatever the hell she was that used to waddle around in the backyard and one year brought her six very frisky funny kits with her (I think they're called kits). The whole family spread out across the yard and proceeded to eat all of the dandelions, god bless them. They seemed to especially enjoy the yellow flowers, but they devoured the whole weed, leaves, stem and all.
Thanks for reminding me of that memory. I miss having a yard.
Laurel,
I am glad you enjoyed this and it brought back some good memories.
Organic and unforced resonates with me--thank you for saying so and for considering that letting the poem have its way is a gift.
Too many times I feel compelled to force the work to fit some form or style that just isn't true to what it wants.
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